Exercise is F#@%ing Hard

Setting the alarm before 5 a.m. Squeezing workouts in on a lunch hour. Waiting for someone to get home so you can run out. Arranging child care. Washing workout clothes multiple times per week. Planning food ahead of time: no dairy, nothing too heavy. Fitting in a workout right before bed. Changing clothes all the time. Showering all the time. Getting to bed early enough. Getting up early enough.

Ugh. Exercise is f#@%ing hard. And some days I just don’t want to deal with it.

Like this morning.

I set my alarm for 4:55 a.m. Went to bed at 10 p.m. The plan was to get in my trainer ride in the morning before work, so 5-5:30 a.m. in order to go swimming at night since my sweet husband (who was horrified when I told him I’d just “wing” the swim portion of the tri in June), reminded me that he was capable of putting our son to bed without me.

But today at 4:55 a.m., I got up, crossed the room and hit “snooze.” At 5:09 a.m., I got up and went into the bathroom to put on my workout clothes.

At 5:16, I was half-dressed for my workout. (I am slow in the morning.) At 5:17, I took off my spandex and put my pajamas on. I set my alarm clock for 5:45, and returned to bed. Yes, I was 5 minutes late to work this morning.

Now it is night time. I am making dinner. My husband, who works later hours, has not come home yet. I should be in my bathing suit ready to dash out as soon as he gets here. But I am not. I am typing this blog post. I am waiting for some cheese to melt. I am feeling so very tired.

Whenever anyone asks me for advice for new runners (it happens occasionally), I say, “Don’t think, just run.” Because if you really stop to think about it, exercise is f#@%ing hard. Not so much the actual workout,  but everything that comes before and after it. And some days I just don’t want to deal with it.

Like tonight.

Decidedly Not Hard Core

Sometimes I pretend I’m pretty hard core when it comes to training. But with the triathlon looming in early June and not a swim since like January or something, it’s pretty apparent that I am not hard core.

Sure, every day, I think about swimming, and then I say to myself: But I don’t feeeeel like swimming. I don’t feel like getting up at the butt crack of dawn. I don’t feel like sharing a lane with a lady who only swims breastroke on her back. 

I whine to myself a lot.

A. Lot.


Yeah, I ride my bike. But not outside. Inside. On the trainer. In front of Fashion Police. Super not hard core.

Now, here’s a woman who is hard core…about plastic surgery. But seriously. I love her.

And then there was Sunday.



Things that Made Sense or Made Me Smile Today

The Boston Marathon tragedy…there’s nothing left to say, is there?

Last night, I tossed and turned for hours. And I wasn’t even there. In Boston. I didn’t experience it like they did…

I’m trying to think positive. Trying not to dwell on the sadness.  Trying to remember all the good in the world. Trying to be thankful it wasn’t worse than it was. Trying to be glass is half full about it, which of course isn’t easy. And so, I don’t know what to write really. But when I feel overwhelmed, lists help:

Things that made me smile today:

  • My husband suggesting a weekend trip to see the tulips.
  • Other runners waving to me on my run.
  • A honk-honk at me on my run that I knew was for Boston.
  • Seeing e-mails from my friends pop up in my Inbox.
  • My son helping me make dinner.
  • My son getting the mail out of the mailbox and saying, “I’ve never reached into the mailbox before!” (Clearly an exciting moment.)

Things that made sense to me today:


Seattle Rock N Roll Marathon race shirt with my grandmother’s pearls.

I refuse to list the things that don’t make sense. Besides, I am pretty sure all of our lists would be the same.

I’m So Angry

Maybe it’s too early to post about this…before we know exactly what happened at the Boston Marathon, but I’m just so angry, I can’t help it.

We can’t run safely too early in the morning. It’s not safe to go at night. You shouldn’t run alone. I have to carry Mace on every run. And NOW you can’t even run (or WATCH) a race without questioning your safety.

I’m sick. I’m sad. And I’m angry.

How Am I Going to Do This?!

I can’t get up early anymore. I have to, but it’s so.damn.exhausting. I remember a couple years ago, I was up at 4:30 to hit the gym prior to work (I have to be at work at 7). Now, I have to drag myself out of bed at 5:30—and that’s after hitting snooze…twice.

Hey, Lucy--that is MY pillow and I would like it back!
Hey, Lucy–that is MY pillow and I would like it back!

So, how in the hell, am I going to train for this tri? As you might have guessed, I’ve been working on my training schedule.

I had planned on getting a gym membership—one with a pool, spin classes and yoga—but it is so expensive to get started, and it’s just not in the budget right now. The public pool isn’t cheap either, but I could keep costs to a minimum by swimming just twice per week. The hours for public swim suck, though, and the only time that really fits in my schedule is the 5-7 a.m. block of time. Ugh. Extra days of getting up at an ungodly hour.

And then there’s the bike. Last night, I finished a 30-minute bike ride at 9:30 p.m. I am supposed to be in bed at 9:30 p.m….or, at least, prepping to get into bed! Because I have to be up again at 5:30, and I don’t function well on 6 hours or less of sleep per night. I don’t want to work out directly after I get home from the office because I want to have a couple of hours with my kid, plus making dinner, cleaning up, etc.

Running, I’ve got. Three days a week, I can run on my lunch hour. I can’t bike or swim on my lunch hour…so, during the middle of the week, that leaves only early in the morning before work or late at night after my son’s in bed (and/or I’m supposed to be getting ready for bed) for those two activities.

My only saving grace is that it is a sprint, which means I could probably get through it with minimal training and not die. But, come June 15, it ain’t gonna be pretty…sort of like me at 5:30 in the morning.

June is Gonna be Nuts!

The month of June is going to be a little crazy. I’m basically gorging myself on races.

First up, there’s gonna be a little of this:

Tiffany, Mel, me and Zoe at the finish last year.

That’s right. The Honey Buckettes are going back to the 50-mile relay Rainier to Ruston on June 1 to defend our title. (Recap here.) Of course, one member of our team is too busy growing a human to run with us.  😉

But our friend Alyssa is happy to fill in for Mel this year. We’re excited to race again. The other two members are superstars Zoe and Tiffany. And, once again, we will have our very own relay driver! Huge thanks to Tiff’s hubby, Will.

It’s okay! He’s a relay driver.

Not sure if I will be running Leg 2 again or if someone else wants the pleasure.

A little mud there.

I kind of want to see what I can do knowing the course ahead of time, but I also don’t want to injure myself before…


My first tri, a sprint, will be on June 15 at the Dilettante Women’s Triathlon. I’m super nervous and it’s only April. Jill is doing this tri, too, so that helps ease my fears a little. Plus, she did it last year and had a blast.

BTW, if you want to sign up, you can get $10 by using the code INSANITYDWT13. It’s only $75 right now, so that’s only 65 bucks. For a tri! Pretty please come do this with me and Jill!

I want to do well in my first tri, but I also want to do well the very next weekend at…

Zoe and me rockin’ the VIP port-o-potties pre-race.

Rock ‘N’ Roll Seattle Half Marathon (June 22). Last year (recap), was so much fun, I’m not sure this year can top it. Luckily, I’ve decided to try for a PR (goal of 1:50–my current PR from 2011 is 1:52). This is a pretty hilly course, though, so it’ll be a challenge!

Actually, looks like ALL of June will be a challenge.

Are you also a race gorger? (I don’t think that’s really a word.) What races are you looking forward to most this year?

A Sign I Need More Strength Training

Hans and Frans are here to “pump” me up. Pun completely intended.

My Odyssey was sort of low on gas on Saturday when we got home. Jamey, my husband, backed it up our hill driveway and parked it. Not sure if that’s a habit from his police academy days or what. Me, I like to back it in when I have a quarter or less of a tank. Why? Because if I pull in front-first on our steep driveway, it says I have no gas when I get in the car AND I REALLY DO.

If I don’t back in, then the next time I drive, I’m freaked out because the gas light is on. I’m all like, Do I actually NOT have gas? Am I going to run out of gas? Where’s the next gas station? I don’t have time for gas…oh, the light’s off now. Stupid gas light. I KNEW I had gas!

So, funny story…

On Monday (we didn’t go anywhere on Sunday), I got in the minivan with Karsen to go to Costco and it wouldn’t start. Chuh-chuhg-chuh-chuhg-chuh-chuhg. I knew it wasn’t the battery because I’ve had that happen lots and lots of times and that is totally a click-click and not a chuh-chuhgI felt the panic start to rise up from my core, but recognizing how I usually FREAK OUT about stupid stuff, I stayed calm.

That’s probably why I remembered that Jamey had filled up the 5-gallon gas can on Easter weekend! Oh happy day! 

I mean, getting locked out of the house (with no phone BTW) by the dogs–ahem BENNIE–…


… just a couple of Mondays ago, I really did not want to have someone come over and bail me out. AGAIN.

After calling the hubs to confirm that it was actually gas in the can, and not some special yard machine mix or something, I spent 10 minutes figuring out how to get the stupid little yellow cap off and threw a screwdriver in the garage  , but I remained calm.

It took a while to tip almost 5 gallons of gas into my car, and toward the end of it all, my arms were shaking holding that thing at such an impossible angle. But I did get the van to start with hubby coaching me on the phone! Go me.

This morning, when I dragged my body out of bed at 5:15 a.m. (and stumbled to hit snooze), I was all Ouch! Why are my arms so freaking sore?!

I guess it’s time to get back into the habit of strength training. Ya think?